thoughts.

this week passed by rather fine, as usual... not with any major hiccups or surprises. finally, next field is my first and final outfield deployment exercise for my course. gonna last around 4 days 3 nites. not that i've never stepped outfield before, but having "nua-ed" in camp for the past 10 weeks will require myself some adjustment to for the upcoming week in the jungle feeding mosquitoes.

i finally read "Tuesdays with Morrie". it was a very nice and light read like five people and it's written in the similar way with interchanges of the past and present. but it's more thought provoking. so much so that i kinda lost sleep yesterday night. after reading the book, i was somehow compelled to question myself if i am going to end up living like mitch - a high paying journalist then with a fat paycheck that came with sleepless nights at his office desk, drowning himself with caffeine. materially fufilled and complete albeit disillusioned and driven by wealth as dictated by the existent socio-culutral mores.

it's very much like what the book shared about the difficulty in striking the balance - "the tension of the opposites". it's as if a mental struggle... the rational and practical me is telling me i have to get a degree, a job, financial independence and so on. besides, living in my self enclosed ivory tower of idealism does not equate to survival in a pragmatic society. the idealistic me tells me i should attempt things i never dared to and always wanted to. what that encompasses, im still on my way in my journey of discovery called "life". when i have consolidated that checklist, perhaps i might just dump everything aside and pursue them. meanwhile, i can only grapple with what life throws me and tackle every ordeal that comes my way a step at a time. giant leaps i may not be apt at but i'll thrive with every baby step i take.

come next week, i'll be meeting wenqian for farewell lunch. this buddy of mine i've made since my scouting days is going to uk's imperial college to study chemical engineering. how cool. it'll certainly be long before i'll meet him again.

goodbye to you my trusted friend. take care.