here i am... 0830h sydney time, 0430h singapore time. back from a morning run around my aunt's neighbourhood. i guess it's the first time i WILLINGLY woke up so early for weeks, not taking into account days for my Cambodia expedition where reveille timing of 0700 were the norm. these few days that i've spent at australia were really carefree... and cash free too (nothing beats holidays that are hosted by your relatives =))
for the large part of my time in Australia (sounds kinda long but it's only been a week ha) so far, the pace of life has really gone a notch down, vis-a-vis that of mine in Singapore. and it's summer and daylight saving here so i can indulge in literally, "daydreaming" or euphemistically speaking, "pondering over weighty life issues" or yet in a very common lingo for my Cambodia expedition - "emo-ing"=p
and when you talk about the state of "emo-ing", somehow this time for my trip in Australia, it took an interesting turn for me. previously in Cambodia I was the "emo-er", now over at Australia, one of my cousin took over the title and somehow i've become like Darren (oops, luckily he won't read this) - sort of flamboyant, boisterous and pesky =p. and it's interesting to really look at this "mirror" (although i wasn't really emo to that kinda extent) and realise how distant and withdrawn i was at times. not that it was by circumstances but rather, it was by choice that i chose to have more "me-time" and then what came to my mind was what a guy from Samaritan's Purse, David Fisher said about having multiple functions in life i.e. he was a consultant to help the needy at Cambodia, father in the UK and etc. you get the drift. so i thought i should learn to be more flexible at times and not be restricted to my narrow mental confines.
continuing from where i left off from... i'm back from sydney opera house and shopping at paddy's market. now enjoying a bottle of carlton cold beer and surfing the net. life's great when you're not lugging any baggage of any sort...
shouldn't it always be so?
Sunday, December 30, 2007
Friday, December 21, 2007
khymer rouge transiting at sillypore, then to down under.
i deliberately used such a long title so as to avoid the hassle of blogging multiple times. looking back on the past few weeks, especially after ORD, my life has been real hectic. like clearing and delegating everything under my portfolio for creative home then zipping to REACH for cambodia trip and catching up with friends and all... and now, i'm back at home - feeling really liberated and light (pun unintended because i definitely gained much pounds from the trip!).
and unlike my blog entry for the previous philippines trip, this entry of mine shall describe more of my self discovery and revelations rather than depicting the day to day experiences. in a nutshell, i much enjoyed this expedition. team dyanmics was much better because there was more bonding and greater diversity with less "cliquishness" and of course, there were my two buds - jc and darren on the trip. we made hell lotsa noise during the expedition and cracking our own insider jokes like "gei jia tang"
on the downside, i was supposedly one of the few that were expected to rise up and lead the team. but, i was kinda subdued and cooped up in my own mental dimension most of the times. so much so that during the appreciation night, i earned the title of Mr. Senti-Emo. act i was like telling joanne and jc... my habitual tendency to dramatise my emotions and then sink in a melancholic and melodramatic emotional rut. it's like my second nature! ironically, for people that have worked with me on an adhoc basis like Creative Home, they don't see the "emo" side of me rather the professional and deliberately blur side of me. and then i rationalise, justifiy and gather that i am the person that needs lots of "me time" the lack thereof - i'll just "drift" away. but i'm glad i got to see and know myself better. i need to and will change for i won't be contented with taking the back seat for the rest of my life, especially after 20 years of doing so. it's high time i take the reins and grasp the steering wheel, it's now or never.
fortunately on the upside yet again, i've really got to improve my relationships with several people. one of which is qianhua. we've came a long way back since philippines last year. from me harbouring a crush on her to revelation night at mt belumut and then to our catching up for the recent camodian expedition. and we concurred, the fact that nothing can work out between both of us in a platonic setting all the more will make us treasure this friendship of ours. though initially it was annoying when people were talking behind our backs but then we started to laugh it away at their attempts to complicate matters that were crystal clear and simple!
also, i will really reminisce the times we (darren, jc, me and lil ben), the project heads, had our late night meetings with aunty joanne at lucky star hotel. during those nights when we crack lame cold jokes to make fun of each other and the daidee sessions... the nights never were lonely with them ha. not forgetting mich, corinna, staff joe and doctor joe... they were the few that i could really connect to and confide in. the conversations that we shared, the advice that they dispensed with and the common experiences we all went through together. i believe they'll come surging back to me in time to come.
i've really learnt and enjoyed myself at Cambodia. let me catch up on some work (japanese test tmr, applications for youth grps and other commitments) on my transit at Singapore, en route to Down Under. then i'll return - rejuvenated with fresh perspectives, settled and upbeat emotions and a greater than ever thirst for success for my many ambitious pursuits in 2008.
c'est la vie - carpe diem!
and unlike my blog entry for the previous philippines trip, this entry of mine shall describe more of my self discovery and revelations rather than depicting the day to day experiences. in a nutshell, i much enjoyed this expedition. team dyanmics was much better because there was more bonding and greater diversity with less "cliquishness" and of course, there were my two buds - jc and darren on the trip. we made hell lotsa noise during the expedition and cracking our own insider jokes like "gei jia tang"
on the downside, i was supposedly one of the few that were expected to rise up and lead the team. but, i was kinda subdued and cooped up in my own mental dimension most of the times. so much so that during the appreciation night, i earned the title of Mr. Senti-Emo. act i was like telling joanne and jc... my habitual tendency to dramatise my emotions and then sink in a melancholic and melodramatic emotional rut. it's like my second nature! ironically, for people that have worked with me on an adhoc basis like Creative Home, they don't see the "emo" side of me rather the professional and deliberately blur side of me. and then i rationalise, justifiy and gather that i am the person that needs lots of "me time" the lack thereof - i'll just "drift" away. but i'm glad i got to see and know myself better. i need to and will change for i won't be contented with taking the back seat for the rest of my life, especially after 20 years of doing so. it's high time i take the reins and grasp the steering wheel, it's now or never.
fortunately on the upside yet again, i've really got to improve my relationships with several people. one of which is qianhua. we've came a long way back since philippines last year. from me harbouring a crush on her to revelation night at mt belumut and then to our catching up for the recent camodian expedition. and we concurred, the fact that nothing can work out between both of us in a platonic setting all the more will make us treasure this friendship of ours. though initially it was annoying when people were talking behind our backs but then we started to laugh it away at their attempts to complicate matters that were crystal clear and simple!
also, i will really reminisce the times we (darren, jc, me and lil ben), the project heads, had our late night meetings with aunty joanne at lucky star hotel. during those nights when we crack lame cold jokes to make fun of each other and the daidee sessions... the nights never were lonely with them ha. not forgetting mich, corinna, staff joe and doctor joe... they were the few that i could really connect to and confide in. the conversations that we shared, the advice that they dispensed with and the common experiences we all went through together. i believe they'll come surging back to me in time to come.
i've really learnt and enjoyed myself at Cambodia. let me catch up on some work (japanese test tmr, applications for youth grps and other commitments) on my transit at Singapore, en route to Down Under. then i'll return - rejuvenated with fresh perspectives, settled and upbeat emotions and a greater than ever thirst for success for my many ambitious pursuits in 2008.
c'est la vie - carpe diem!
Thursday, December 06, 2007
bye bye MSC, bye bye bravo flt, bye bye 163, bye bye NS.
ytd was the last day for me to be donned in all green. as it always is, time passes by so fast that you dont even realise that you have been through it already. ytd held many significant "last times" for me. though i know before long, i'll be stepping back again into lim chu kang camp 2 for reservice. but till then, i'm very much a civilian. no more of doing ridiculous things at unearthly timing e.g. no-duff activations, playing push up dai dee and watching old mediacorp dramas. aww...
i wonder if it's human nature to always detest being in the process and to so look forward to culmination. then on culmination, you realise things weren't that bad afterall in looking back. in fact, you begin to reminisce about those "awful" times you've spent together and wish you have a chance to replay the entire the process (maybe snipping off those truly nasty times). and then i realise, isn't it so much so for life, in general? hahaa... random musings, while i take a break from work at scape.
anw back to our ord celebration dinner at MSC yesterday. it was real heartwarming to see those the familiar faces once again. some you wished you had took the hpi cranking handle and then wield it towards their head - okay, im kidding. don't really have one i hate to that extent. others you know crap talk follows promptly on meeting. e.g. cpt chua.
and as msn nick speaks - it's an emotional imperative to appreciate and be appreciated. isn't that how life should be and the premise by which, it should operate with? we had good food and sharing during dinner. then shortly after, encik jaswant asked us to share the experiences we had in bravo flt, dispense advices and then comment on the management. i only touched on the first two and none of the last, perhaps i'm resigned to the way things are operated in bravo. talked about "choosing the right partners during guard duty" (- gwee, really want to see your reaction to this, but you were overseas), "being gam with the others in bravo flt" and "treasuring the friendships forged during our short stint"
now that i have ended my NS stint, what holds for me in the near future. the completion of creative home?
end it... not. :(
i wonder if it's human nature to always detest being in the process and to so look forward to culmination. then on culmination, you realise things weren't that bad afterall in looking back. in fact, you begin to reminisce about those "awful" times you've spent together and wish you have a chance to replay the entire the process (maybe snipping off those truly nasty times). and then i realise, isn't it so much so for life, in general? hahaa... random musings, while i take a break from work at scape.
anw back to our ord celebration dinner at MSC yesterday. it was real heartwarming to see those the familiar faces once again. some you wished you had took the hpi cranking handle and then wield it towards their head - okay, im kidding. don't really have one i hate to that extent. others you know crap talk follows promptly on meeting. e.g. cpt chua.
and as msn nick speaks - it's an emotional imperative to appreciate and be appreciated. isn't that how life should be and the premise by which, it should operate with? we had good food and sharing during dinner. then shortly after, encik jaswant asked us to share the experiences we had in bravo flt, dispense advices and then comment on the management. i only touched on the first two and none of the last, perhaps i'm resigned to the way things are operated in bravo. talked about "choosing the right partners during guard duty" (- gwee, really want to see your reaction to this, but you were overseas), "being gam with the others in bravo flt" and "treasuring the friendships forged during our short stint"
now that i have ended my NS stint, what holds for me in the near future. the completion of creative home?
end it... not. :(
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